Welcome to 3-2-1 Tuesdays with Better Wellness Naturally- Is Familiarity a Safe Haven or a Trap?
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- 7 days ago
- 5 min read
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Quick bits of therapeutic info and learning, ideas, concepts, and quotes.
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3: Keys
2: Concepts
1: Quick Article
“In any given moment we have two options: to step forward into growth or to step back into safety." — Abraham Maslow
3 Keys:
Comfort Zones Can Become Cages: Familiar routines, environments, and relationships may provide a sense of stability, but they can also hold us back. The spaces that once nurtured us can quietly turn into cages that limit our potential. Whether it’s staying in a job that drains us, holding onto outdated beliefs, or repeating unhelpful habits, comfort can become stagnation. Growth requires change, and change often requires discomfort.
We Confuse Predictability with Safety: Our brains are wired for patterns—predictability feels secure because it reduces uncertainty. Just because something is familiar, though, doesn’t mean it’s good for us. Many people stay in toxic relationships, exhausting routines, or unfulfilling careers simply because they know what to expect. True safety isn’t about avoiding the unknown—it’s about making choices that genuinely support our mental, emotional, and physical well-being.
Change Feels Risky; Staying Stuck Is Riskier: It’s natural to fear the unfamiliar, but we often overlook the risks of staying the same. Avoiding change can lead to missed opportunities, emotional exhaustion, and even physical health issues linked to chronic stress and dissatisfaction. The real danger isn’t stepping into something new—it’s staying in something that no longer serves us and slowly losing ourselves in the process.
A Couple of Concepts
"Learned Familiarity" Can Be Misleading: Many people mistake repeated experiences for safe ones, a concept tied to operant conditioning. If we’ve endured a stressful job or an unhealthy relationship and survived, we might assume it’s our best option simply because it’s familiar. This can prevent us from exploring new possibilities that are actually healthier and more fulfilling. Recognizing this bias allows us to challenge our assumptions and make more intentional, growth-oriented choices.
Courage Over Comfort: Why Change Feels Hard: The amygdala, the brain’s fear center, often reacts to change as if it’s a threat which triggers anxiety. However, research in behavioral psychology shows that gradual exposure to new experiences can rewire our fear response. Whether it’s starting a new routine, having difficult conversations, or making bold life changes, stepping outside of our comfort zone—one small step at a time—helps our brain associate change with growth rather than danger.
A Quick Overview: Why Familiarity Isn’t Always Safe
Familiarity feels safe. It’s predictable, and our brains are wired to crave certainty. But just because something is known doesn’t mean it’s the best choice for us. Psychological research suggests that our preference for familiarity often keeps us trapped in situations that limit our potential.
The mere exposure effect explains why we tend to favor people, places, and habits we repeatedly encounter—even if they’re not beneficial. Similarly, status quo bias makes us resistant to change, even when new opportunities could improve our well-being. These mental shortcuts evolved to help us navigate the world efficiently, but they can also work against us—causing us to mistake comfort for security and avoid growth out of fear.
At the same time, neuroscience provides hope for breaking free from these patterns. The concept of neuroplasticity shows that our brains can adapt and rewire themselves when we engage in new experiences. Each time we step outside our comfort zone, we create new neural connections that strengthen our ability to handle uncertainty, make better decisions, and build confidence. Studies show that learning new skills, changing environments, and embracing discomfort can improve cognitive function and emotional resilience.
If change feels overwhelming, start small. Research shows that gradual exposure to new experiences is one of the best ways to rewire our fear response. Instead of making a huge leap, take one intentional step:
If a big career change feels too risky, start by networking or learning a new skill.
If leaving a toxic environment seems impossible, practice setting small boundaries first.
If an unfamiliar opportunity scares you, say yes to something small and build from there.
Real safety isn’t about clinging to the familiar—it’s about trusting ourselves in the unknown. The biggest risk isn’t stepping into something new; it’s staying in something that no longer serves us.
The question to ask yourself is:
Am I here because it’s safe, or just because it’s familiar?
If you're ready to step into growth but need the right support, consider joining us this coming July 12-17, 2025, at Imiloa Institute, Costa Rica, for the Storms of Change Healing Retreat—a space designed for deep healing, self-discovery, and transformation. It’s happening in just a few months, offering you the opportunity to step away from the familiar and into a setting that nurtures real change.
References:
Doidge, N. (2007). The Brain That Changes Itself: Stories of Personal Triumph from the Frontiers of Brain Science. Penguin.
Draganski, B., Gaser, C., Busch, V., Schuierer, G., Bogdahn, U., & May, A. (2006). Neuroplasticity: Changes in grey matter induced by training. Nature, 427(6972), 311–312.
LeDoux, J. (2002). The Synaptic Self: How Our Brains Become Who We Are. Viking.
Samuelson, W., & Zeckhauser, R. (1988). Status quo bias in decision making. Journal of Risk and Uncertainty, 1, 7-59.
Zajonc, R. B. (1968). Attitudinal effects of mere exposure. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 9(2), 1–27.
Better Wellness Retreats. (n.d.). Storms of Change Healing Retreat. Retrieved from https://www.betterwellnessretreats.com
We’re Going on Retreat in July!
Limited Spaces Available - We’d Love to Have You Join Us!
In light of what so many of us have endured here in Florida, the Storms of Change Retreat offers a sanctuary to reconnect with inner resilience and rediscover a deeper sense of safety and strength.
Designed for those ready to transform upheaval into growth, this immersive six-day in-retreat experience—to be held at the incredible Imiloa Institute—blends healing practices, expert guidance, and Costa Rica’s natural beauty to inspire meaningful transformation and renew your sense of hope.
Imiloa Institute, a private 5-star wellness and yoga retreat center, offers a safe, supportive, intimate, and thoughtfully designed space to encourage healing, reflection, connection, and lasting renewal.
For more info and to Retreat with us: www.BetterWellnessRetreats.com
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